Wednesday, February 6, 2019

How To Fight The Abuser

How To Fight The Abuser
© Surazeus
2019 02 06

When Evelyn strolls by the apple tree
she hears the invisible bird of faith
describe the monster with the human face
who preaches about love from God above
while sucking her soul with his vampire mind
so she snatches wings of sunlight from death.

Her fear and hope are so together wound
tight as taut wires of electric guitar
that her aching heart twangs at snapping voice
of people smiling through unconcerned mask
of polite contraption breaking her thought
to shudder horrified at hidden truth.

Trapped on quiet afternoon walk somewhere
she has to be before the clanging bell,
Evelyn stops by the old apple tree
that waits indifferent to all human pain,
and thinks about the sparkling summer rain
when she was free to run and play with joy.

He pushes hard into my aching mind
at painful shock of anguish without words
to escape gripping hands that twist my arm
and wrench my heart from haven of surprise,
then snarls with contempt in my naked ear
vile insults that mock my sweet innocence.

I want to tell some person I can trust
how our church priest raped me against my will,
though he insisted I should never tell
or God would cast me in hot fires of hell,
but horror of suffering humiliation
already consumes my heart with despair.

Now I know why Jennifer attacked him
last year with the knife to stop his attacks,
but they locked her in the mental asylum
so I cannot follow her path to hell,
or I would never escape cement cell
to breathe sweet pungent air of liberty.

The vast structure of our society
was built by men to favor rights of men
controlling bodies of women and girls
so they can satisfy their lust on us
regardless of our private choice of will,
so they would punish me, but never him.

If I cannot strike at him for his crimes
without suffering from unjust retribution,
meted by indifferent state run by men,
I feel numb anguish to strike at myself,
and wound my flesh to ease my mental pain
by inflicting physical pain on myself.

I want to live and enforce my free will
to savor sweet pleasures of being alive,
so I must harden my heart against despair
and tap deep well of forceful energy
to strengthen my will with determined trust
and fight against oppressor of my soul.

I will not let that man define my life
except to waken warrior will to fight
for liberty of choice to live my way,
enforcing justice of objective law
to punish evil men for hateful crimes
when they abuse people for their own lust.

Feeling strange flow of strength flush her heart,
Evelyn spreads angel wings of wild flames
in leaping ascension above despair,
then leans dizzy against indifferent tree
and laughs with sudden freedom of bold purpose
at fierce resolve to fight hard for her rights.

Adjusting wings she snatched from fear of pain,
Evelyn continues to her next class,
breathing deep cool wind that rustles dry leaves,
and considers how to fight the abuser
by navigating assumptions and laws
that maintain liberty of her free will.

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