Tragic Joy Of Love

Tragic Joy Of Love
© Surazeus
2024 11 12

Lost in the in-between times of the mind, 
I pluck from valley of the wailing horse 
old withered flowers of religious faith, 
then cry unto the cloud-god in the sky 
if he would like to come by soon enough 
to rescue me from life of suffering. 

Long stare I at the sparkling clouds of power 
while waiting with loyal faith of the fool 
for cloud-god to answer my sincere prayer, 
but he must be deaf to my faint soft voice, 
or maybe he is cruel and mocks my faith, 
for nothing but rain ever answers me. 

Yet in the soothing patter of that rain, 
which splashes rhythmically on flowered fields, 
I hear the healing voice of timeless love 
console my aching heart with sympathy, 
and with each sparkling splash of kind support 
encourage me to let my sorrow go. 

Strange flush of sudden ardency of hope 
bursts gushing from dark fountain of my heart 
at thought that Nature wants me to succeed 
since she created body of my soul 
from mucky soil with kiss of blazing light 
that sparks wild passion flaming in my mind. 

At darkest hour of terror freezing me 
warm ray of gold light streams from swirling cloud 
as if my father, killed by gang of thieves, 
looks down at me with open eye of love, 
so I reach out with open hands of faith 
to catch each glowing drop of rain to drink. 

Deep in my hollow heart of painful angst 
bright spark of joy bursts into writhing flame 
so I breathe deep ethereal voice of doom 
and sing world-shaking melody of hope 
for hours to channel lightning strike of truth 
through fragile body of my ancient soul. 

I sing about harsh suffering I endure, 
and sing about my desperate search for help, 
and sing about my fearful grasp at death, 
and sing about my sad unanswered prayer, 
and sing about the rain that cleanses me 
and fills my hollow heart with timeless joy. 

Discarding destination of my quest 
that lead me wandering lost in nowhere land, 
I walk across vast plain of blooming flowers, 
plucking berries to eat as I explore, 
and touch each object I create with name, 
heart flapping wings in tragic joy of love.