Alarm Bells Of Anxiety

Alarm Bells Of Anxiety
© Surazeus
2017 11 13

Alarm bells of anxiety ring loud
in echo chamber of my ears each time
I walk along the maze of city streets
through teeming crowds of people without names.

I want to leap in the Power Ranger stance
and shield my vulnerability of hope
for pleasant love in armor of contempt
to protect my beating heart from vampires.

The wordless glance of sharp judgmental eyes
strikes spears of hatred through my mirrored mind
to shatter my self-confidence in shards
that each reflect lost moments of abuse.

I could retreat into sweet fantasy
of my superior genius for self-worth
to hide behind walls of accomplishments,
but who would see me beyond sterile smiles?

Though every man who walks hard city streets
glares back at me with grim suspicious fear
I will not shrivel in rays of contempt,
instead soaking hate through my skin like frogs.

We bare our teeth in cheerful smiles of rage
to snarl laughter like wolves in the pack
that vie for dominance in games of power,
but I would rather smell this honey flower.

Contend with each other for who plays god
of killing wrath, but I will play the fool
who mocks you with adoring quips of love
so I avoid the daggers in your words.

When alarm bells of anxiety clang
loud enough to hollow my aching heart,
I check real world for dangers I invent,
then whistle past the graveyard of my fear.