Want To Build My House

Want To Build My House
© Surazeus
2025 08 15

I want to build my house with sturdy walls 
inside wide bend of the sparkling river 
so we can play beneath lush apple trees 
in fertile valley among verdant hills, 
but dream of paradise vanished in mist 
six thousand years before hour of my birth. 

Orange mist sparkles in maze of cement streets 
from lights in windows of tall square steel towers 
as I walk cluttered sidewalk past street lamps 
to red-brick apartment with fear-locked doors 
where I sit at wood desk by the cracked window 
and type lines of verse about paradise. 

Slicing beef, onions, peppers, and tomatoes, 
I grill supper on apartment rooftop 
while ravens gather on sagging phonelines, 
then eat hamburger in eerie moonlight 
in sad attempt of my time-aching heart 
to recreate paradise of the past. 

Strumming guitar with callused fingertips, 
I sing, "Today is last day of my job, 
so when I get home I will write weird poem 
of how my hopeless heart still longs to roam 
sea to shining sea in land of the free," 
then quick-pick old heart-breaking melody. 

While typing endless lines of tangled verse 
to help my restless spirit navigate 
confusing maze of myths in human dreams, 
I look up at flutter of eager wings 
to see the citrine wagtail with sharp eyes 
that seem to see weird beauty of my soul. 

So I think about the day years ago 
when man first walked on surface of the moon 
to find that angels live in paradise 
where thousands of crystal cathedrals gleam 
because I want to understand how fate 
is written by each choice our wild hearts make. 

I want to return to Calabria 
to live in Aragonese Castle I built 
with noble purpose to guard paradise, 
but I stroll down to the corner cafe 
to eat beef sandwich with cheese on rye 
while helicopters putter in the sky. 

Old woman who survived the holocaust 
paints portrait of me as angel with wings, 
then conjures the moon from song of the sea 
so I understand truth of liberty 
earned by the courage of great warriors 
willing to die to protect paradise.