Wild Electric Anguish

Wild Electric Anguish
© Surazeus
2023 01 05

When my body vibrates with intense hope 
that flame of my mind will glow through the storm 
I feel immortal soul of genes flash bright 
with wild electric anguish of desire, 
and then I know my soul still pulses fierce 
deep in dark hollow abyss of my heart. 

Huddling small in curve of the jagged crag 
high on steep slope of the arrogant mountain, 
I curl my body against raging blasts 
of mocking wind to shield fragile soul flame 
safe from stinging arrows of icy rain, 
till all memory of warm light dissipates. 

Closing my eyes against harsh gloom of fear, 
I search dark forest of my memories 
for summer afternoons by the blue river 
where I danced slowly with elegant grace 
among fluttering leaves of broad apple trees, 
munching on sweet fruit in warm glow of light. 

Sweet memory of warm summer afternoons 
when I lounged on riverbanks under broad trees 
nurtures frail glimmer of light in my heart 
so I cling to vestige of warm-winged hope 
to shelter fragile fabric of my soul 
as shield against hostile storm of despair. 

Yet ever smaller in vast swirl of rage 
my body shrinks to fragile gleam of hope 
so small in boundless expanse of bleak fear 
that I almost welcome numb nothingness 
till I float bodiless in thoughtless void 
as last spark of light in the universe. 

Forever lost in nothingness of death, 
I drift on agitated waves of ennui, 
no longer caring if I live or die, 
naked in vast gloom of indifferent time, 
as fragments of my soul swirl wild in wind 
like seeds sowers scatter in sordid soil. 

Then deep in timeless abyss of lost faith 
first flash of heart-aching eternity 
flares forth from minuscule bang of desire 
to explode in harrowing light of dawn 
that shatters darkness into shards of time 
with eerie calm of rain-soaked honesty. 

Uncurling my frail soul from egg of Earth, 
I stretch my body by the jagged crag 
and gaze from high arrogant mountain peak 
at treeless meadows sloping into flowers 
that beam out into silver sea of joy 
which smirks amused to see me still alive.